Seed

Okayyyyy I’ve finally relented and decided to update. In all honesty, much has progressed since my last post, but I’ve just not been in the mood to type it all out (unlike Shari, who has suddenly resurrected her blog from the dust, haha). And also, I have to say that the past two weeks have been so busy with other assignments and essays and that I haven’t been thinking about the project much.

I really can’t wait for this sem to be over!

So anyway, after much brain-racking and endless cups of Ribena, here’s how I would sum up my project:

Wishing is a collective yet individual human tendency that springs from inciting possibility—whereby the contents of wishes themselves are not so much desired as the possibility of them being fulfilled. This “possibility” depends very much on the balance between (usually) unsubstantiated belief and anticipation, and rational action taken—the former leading into the realm of superstition and magical thinking, and the latter very much taking the form of goals or aims.

Okay, I see you scratching your head over there. So, to further illustrate, here’s an, uh, illustration:

Every wish each person has is like a seed. If nothing is done to it, it remains just that; a seed, or a mental desire in our head. However, we all know that what’s great and exciting about a seed is that it has the possibility of becoming a tree, with leaves, fruit, flowers and so on. (Hence the low opacity on the tree, if you noticed, because its only an imagined state.) This tree, in my little analogy, would be equal to the possibility of a fulfilled wish (or wishes).

In order for the seed to grow and fulfill its possibility, however, it relies on two elements—nature and nurture (for lack of better terms). Nature would involve sunlight, rain and other natural elements that are essential for the seed to grow, and this would be my metaphor for “belief”, superstition, anticipation, hope, and whatever you might call it. Nurture, on the other hand, involves a conscious effort of ploughing the soil, watering the seed, spraying fertilizers etc, which would be the metaphor for “action” or rational, physical steps taken to ensure that the wish comes true.

To complete the analogy, the “type of seed” may differ according to the type of wish one makes (tangible, fantastical etc), and the “type of environment” the seed grows in may differ according to the attitudes and beliefs of the wisher. For example, a ground which already has fertile soil may need little “work” on the part of the grower; and natural elements play a larger part in helping the seed grow. This could be likened to a wisher who is highly superstitious, and believes that simply making a wish and leaving it to “fate” to make it come true is good enough, without taking any further action to fulfill it.

The premise, however, is that there must always be both elements involved, no matter the proportion of each one, in order for the possibility of wish-fulfillment to be present.

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Right! Hope that explanation was clear/helpful/useful? Leave me a comment or feedback to let me know!

A Wishing Formula

Today Math said to me, in a cheeky sort of way: You can run, but you can’t hide!

Because believe it or not, you can even apply mathematical formulas to the concept of ‘wishing’—in this case, the level of ‘wishedforness’ (preference or intensity of the wish). Taken from the paper Remarks on Wishes and Counterfactuals, Ernest W. Adams:

Theories of preference and decision can be reinterpreted to apply to wishes and preferences among them – ‘degrees of wishedforness’. Consider the following. Let x and y be ‘objects’ among which a person, P, has preferences, and the strengths of these preferences are measured, as usual, by utilities, u(x) and u(y), in such a way that P prefers x to y if and only if u(x) > u(y). Suppose, moreover, that s1,…,sn are logically possible and mutually exclusive ‘possibilities’ whose probabilities, given, say, x, are given by p(s1/x),…,p(sn/x), respectively. Then Richard Jeffrey’s Logic of Decision (Jeffrey, 1983) implies that

(J) u(x) = u(x&s1)(p(s1/x) +…+ u(x&sn)(p(sn/x) .

Now obviously, I didn’t really understand 3/4 of the paper, considering I haven’t exactly touched Math in about 3 years, but I just found it interesting (and, I have to admit, slightly scary) that even a topic so abstract (or so you would think) as ‘wishes’ could be applied to such rigid formulas.

Besides the scary numbers though, this paper does bring up an important aspect: the fact that all wishes are related to conditionals; that is to say, if I say “I wish you would stay”, the reason or condition behind making that wish is that “I wish you would stay so I could show you my toy collection”. Therefore, different conditionals give rise to different levels of “intensity” in wishes. For example, if the conditional was “I wish you would stay because I really need someone to talk to”, then naturally we could assume that the intensity or ‘degree of wishedforness’ would be higher.

Interesting, no? I’ve been struggling to wrap my head around the concept of different “levels” and types of wishes and how to classify them, and I think this idea of intensity (based on the conditional(s) relating to each wish) seems to do the trick, more or less.

Four-leaf clover

Blowing candles on birthday cake

Dandelion seeds

Pennies in fountain

Wishing stars

Loy Krathong Festival, Thailand

Upon A Four-Leaf Clover Shooting Star Penny

Long-awaited post on the research I did about 2 weeks ago on wishing beliefs, superstitions and customs. What exactly do these entail? Well, I was basically looking into superstitions that people have when it comes to wishing—things we collect, rituals we perform, circumstances we make use of. These often have their roots in deeper, ancient and more religion traditions or practices, but I decided to focus more on the informal, secular and commonplace beliefs that they have evolved into.

You might say: Hey, I’m not the superstitious kind, I definitely don’t practice any rituals or customs. Well, that’s what I thought, but after looking at the many many wishing beliefs there are out there, I realised that I’m not completely exempt from them as well. We subscribe to such thinking generally more than we’d like to acknowledge.

To name the most obvious—and likely to be practiced by almost everyone, including myself—it would be the “close your eyes, make a wish silently without telling anyone, and blow out the candles on your birthday cake in one breath” one. We’re told to do that every birthday, and if we fulfill the necessary criteria of not telling anyone our wish and blowing out the candles in a breath, our wishes will come true. So far in all my 21 years I think I can safely say none of them have worked, but interestingly enough this is not a deterrent in most cases. Just try again the year; after all, no harm done.

Just by this simple act, I’m beginning to work towards some sort of a conclusion, or theory if you will, that when people make wishes, it is not exactly the wish actually coming true that matters, but the fact that it has been made, and the chance that it will. It’s all about hope, it’s all about possibility.

But more on that later. Other “wishing customs” or superstitions include things like wishing upon a shooting star, the first star you see at night, throwing pennies into a fountain, blowing dandelion seeds, finding a four-leaf clover, blowing a fallen eyelash—and also more traditional customs which are more country-specific, like the Tanabata festival in Japan, Loi Krathong in Thailand and slipping wishes on pieces of paper into the cracks of Jerusalem’s Western Wall in Israel.

Quite interestingly, I’ve even found several “modern” inventions which (most probably) have no root in any ancient traditions whatsoever, and have been made up by people in recent years. For example, word has it that if you happen to glance at your digital clock and the time is 11:11 or 3:33, you can make a wish. Or, if your necklace clasp slips to below your chin, you can make a wish as you bring it round to the back. As I doubt digital clocks and necklace clasps were invented very long ago, its quite safe to say that these “superstitions” are rather recently derived as well.

Making a wish is the process of expressing a desire or hope for something in the hope of getting it. Wishing for something is all about wanting something, and doing an action to try to tempt the object of desire from the hands of fate. For the more cynical, who do not expect a wish to come true, the use of the word ‘wish’ is just an expression of want or need. For those of us who have a childish flame in our hearts, it is not uncommon to simply close our eyes and think, ‘I wish I had a nice apple pie right now’. It is just as common for the wisher to open his or her eyes, and feel a tiny, but sharp pang of disappointment at the conspicuous absence of an apple pie. According to cultural tradition, there are several times in a person’s life, or places in the world, where making wishes is more effective in bringing about the desired end result. Source: BBC

What I find so fascinating about such beliefs is their longevity and permeability—being held on to for so many years, all around the world, differing in process but similar in intended outcome—which really shows, in my opinion, how humankind has an innate need for making wishes. In the broader context, perhaps, it again boils down to a sense of hope.

What is complicated, then, is that the concept of wishing is so hard to generalize into a “statement” or theory. Wishing can be nonchalant or it could express your deepest desire, it could be selfish or altruistic, it could be a perfectly tangible, possible wish, or it could be an abstract flight of fantasy. A wish can be something you take action and work towards, or it could be a mere “if only” statement thrown out and left as a wistful thought. When it comes to superstitious wishing beliefs, the amount of rationalism each individual adds into the mix varies considerably, thereby resulting in completely different attitudes and mindsets. Wishing gives hope but also brings disappointment; wishing can speak of regret but also of endless possibility.

So in summary, wishing is ______________?

Sing-a-wishes

As a little sidetrack, been looking into something which started me think about this whole topic on wishes in the first place: lyrics of songs. Just put down a few with videos included so we can get a feel of not only what the lyrics are like, but the songs themselves as well. Do songs which talk about wishing have a certain genre or feel? Apparently not really; I intentionally chose songs from varied genres and where “wishes” are used in different ways—interesting to note that most of these songs are more regretful or wistful wishes more than anything, rather than my initial idea that they would be more fantastical, imaginative etc.

Gregory And The Hawk – A Wish

I wish to feel smaller
under your sheets.
I wish for the whole truth
every time you speak.
I’m thinkin’ about how you care half as much for me
While I watch you arrive, smoke cigarettes, sleep…

And I guess it doesn’t matter what I say or what I seem
You stuck what I felt for you in the pocket of your jeans
Ignoring me the morning after
isn’t enough
and I swear I’m gonna cry.
I’m sick of tryin’ to be tough.

And my blood won’t stick
To the confines of my veins.
And your heart
Is gonna tear mine away.

And I wish to feel smaller under your hands,
though you seem satisfied as you slip mine
down your pants.
And I’m thinkin’ about how you care half as much for me
While you lift up my shirt after asking politely.

And I guess it doesn’t matter what I am or pretend to be
Cuz it’s her you’ll always love and it’s her I’ll always envy.
I want to end this now so dreams of you won’t keep me up.
But I swear I’m gonna cry.
I’m sick of tryin’ to be tough.

Hi5 – 3 Wishes

I’m in your dreams, I’m in your mind
I’m in your imagination.
I’ll be your friend, I’ll be your genie,
Your magical creation…

Cover you eyes, whisper my name
Join in my mystical game.
I’ll make a wish, believe in me,
You’ll never be the same…

Take my hand, close your eyes
Hold my hand and we’ll fly, fly, fly…

If you had three wishes, what would they be?
Three wishes, one, two, three!
Three wishes, would you give one to me?
Three wishes, what would they be?

Ooooh…

Feel the magic, feel the power,
I will always be near.
I’m your genie, your best friend,
When you need me I’ll be here…

Emi Fujita – Wishes

I looked in the sky and there
I saw a star shining so bright above
I closed my eyes and wished upon
the star that I would find true love
Someone who needed me
Someone to share my life
For a love that would be true
I would wait forever
So no matter how long it may be
I will be waiting
One star– brighter than the others
Two Hearts – beating for each other
I believe wishes really come true
Love at first sight I knew it from
the moment when you said hello
I hoped you felt it too, but we were
both so shy – how was I to know
When you reached for my hand
I knew you were the one
We laughed and talked for hours like
I’d known you forever
Like a dream or something from a book
True love had found me
One star – brighter than the others
Two Hearts – beating for each other
Noe I see wishes really come true
You just have to dream
Nothing’s as bad as it seems to be
Believe me
Someone’s waiting for you to try
There in the sky
One star – brighter than the others
Two Hearts – beating for each other
You will see wishes really come true
You can’t stop believing –
Wishes do come true
You gotta believe me (wish on a star)
Wishes do come true

The Pierces – Three Wishes

We’d be so less fragile
If we’re made from metal
And our hearts from iron
And our minds from steel
And if we built an armor
For our tender bodies
Could we love each other
Would we stop to feel

And you want three wishes:
One to fly the heavens
One to swim like fishes
And then one you’re saving for a rainy day
If your lover ever takes her love away

You say you want to know her like a lover
And undo her damage, she’ll be new again
Soon you’ll find that if you try to save her
It renews her anger, you will never win

And you only want three wishes:
You want never bitter
And all delicious

And then one you’re saving for a rainy day
If your lover ever takes her love away

You only want three wishes:
One to fly the heavens
One to swim like fishes
You want never bitter
And all delicious
And a clean conscience
And all it’s blisses
You want one true lover with a thousand kisses
You want soft and gentle and never vicious
And then one you’re saving for a rainy day
If your lover ever takes her love away